Dear Lady, Be Careful! These Are 28 Alarming Signs That Your Man is a Player, Not a Keeper

Although relationships are blissful, they can sometimes become toxic especially if one partner is insincere about the whole deal.

One of the worst scenarios in life: you fall in love with a man, and you want it to escalate into a serious relation­ship. However, unfortunately, he does not. In reality, he is entirely opposed to it. Why, because he is a player – and you are not the only girl he is playing with. Well, it is re­ally tough.

Thus, acknowledging the alarming signs that he is a player will be helpful for you before you begin to develop too deep of emo­tions and feelings in that relation­ship. Find out the top signs he is a player below

You may not be happy about your relationship, and you do not trust your boyfriend. It has hap­pened to everyone. There comes a phase where we are confused if the boy we are dating is a keeper or a player. You do not know ex­actly and you do not want to leave him without any solid proof. So how do you know if your boy­friend is a player? What are the alarming signs he is a player? I have made up a list of signs he is a player to help you know for sure.

1. He talks about s*x regularly.

Talking about sex may be sweet and you also like it. However, if talking about sex is the only thing he talks about all the time, it may be ir­ritating. In case he often shows off a lot about how many girls he has dated before you, or how many girls he has slept with before you, he is surely a player. Run away from him as soon as possible.

2. He shows you off in front of friends.

A keeper always introduces you to friends with the respect. He will be proud of finding you and tell them how lucky he is. On the contrary, a player will show you off as a valued object of interest to his friends. He will introduce you to his friend with pride and say something like” Is not my girl­friend a bombshell?” I guess that you want a guy who loves you and respects you, not who is haunted by your figure. Now, is the right time for you to break up.

3. He has a secured social me­dia profile.

It is okay when some people want to get privacy. However, in case your guy hesitates to go on­line or read his notification mes­sages in front of you, or even he has locked his social media profile from you, there is surely some­thing fishy. Let’s think it over before you trust him.

4. He follows some girls on so­cial media networks.

You know that he is following some hot girls on social media networks, he is a suspect. No guy wastes his time scrolling through girls’ photos if he is not trying or hoping to get some­thing with her. He should spend this time on photos of you, his girlfriend, not some hot girls who would not give him the time of day. He is scummy. You should move on.

5. He has a bad reputation.

When you hear something bad about a guy who you are going out with, believe them. If someone who knows your guy well is telling you that he is a bad person, it may be as he is.
They are not trying to feed you this bad information as they are jealous. They may want you to get happy. They may know this guy is a player and they want to warn you about your guy’s true color. Therefore, you do not get hurt, learn how to accept the truth and move on.

6. He does not share his life with You.

When a guy is falling in love with you, he will want to share all of his life about the ups and downs with you. This is because he wants to get your attention, your love as well as your support.

However, in case the guy you are dating does not open up to you. He often tells you different stories about his past whenever the topic comes up. He always talks to you like the way he is flirt­ing, perhaps, he is not inter­ested in you and is playing with you. A player does not want to tell you anything that could go against him. Thus, some advice for you is that you should know everything about a guy before dating him.

7. He hides his mobile phone from you.

A real relationship is built on faith and trust. Mobile phones and social media network accounts are not important when you are truly loving someone. A keeper will have nothing to hide from his girlfriend.
In case your guy is very weird about his phone and his social network accounts, he texts some­one when you are not around, and he stays away from you to answer some important phone calls. He never gives you his phone and then gets disappointed with you for accusing him of cheating. He probably is a real cheater.

8. He does not want to meet your friends.

In case the guy you are seeing never wants to have a meet­ing with your friends, it probably is because he does not want to get into a serious relationship with you. In case he does not want you to see his friends, there may be the same reason. He also worries that his friends may tell you something about the other girls he is dating. Whether he had someone else or not, if the two of you have been together for a long time and he has never wanted to meet your friends or have you met his friends, it may be a red flag.

In case he does not want to be a big part of your life, it is because he does not want to make a rela­tionship too serious. That said, in case you rush him into seeing your family and your friends after just a couple of dating weeks, you may be too fast. He may have reasons for taking everything slowly, like wanting to give his friends a little time to be used to him having a new girlfriend as he recently end­ed up in a serious relationship.

9. He bails on you.

When he loves you, he will cherish every moment that he spends on being with you. He knows that your time is valuable, so he always tries to spend a lot of time with you and never says no to being with you.

However, in case your guy al­ways misses out or cancels a lot of plans with you, or bails on you at the last minute, it may be be­cause he had another girl to meet who was more important than you. If you hear him tell you that he is too busy and does not have 10 free minutes for anybody, and then you hear that he had a night out with his friends, then this is a sign he is a player. The fact is that if he wants to be with you, he will find the time. If he cares for you, he will be honest instead of lying. Thus, in case you find out that he is spending his precious time with other people, it may be a cause for concern. Canceling plans is not a big deal as everyone is now busy, but if it happens every other day, you are undoubtedly being played on.

10. He always complains.

One of the common signs he is a player is that he is always com­plains. A guy who truly loves you tends to miss out on how you smell and how you look, he loves you for who you are, not for the makeup you can wear for him. However, in case your guy complains a lot. Even when you are looking good, he still says you could be better, and every effort you make is likely to go to waste. Your feelings will end up hurt in the end as he is probably a player.

11. He acts weird when he meets you in public.

In case everything is great when the two of you are alone and he sud­denly acts weird when you run into him in public. This is because either he is dating another girl and he does not want to be seen or he does not want anyone else to think that he is with you. Anyway, this should be a concert.

In case he truly loves you, he should be happy to see you and show you some affection. Of course, he may want to give you some affection in private, but he had better act like he wants to see you. See his body language. If he makes eye contact and moves toward you, that is a good sign. If he stays away from you and keeps looking around, this will mean that he wants to keep his distance.

12. He is reluctant to care for you in public.

If two of you go out, but he acts like you are his sister, you should ask yourself why. If he is a player, he does not want all people to know that he is dating you. This is because either he is trying to keep his choices open or he is dating someone else too. Though not all guys want to hold hands all the time, he should give you some affection if he truly loves you.

You may not want to put pressure on him to care for you in public too early, but after several dates, if he still stays away from you whenever you are out together, then this is a cause for concern.

13. He does not want to talk about the future.

In case your guy always changes the subject whenever you want to talk about the future, even if you are just talking about the holiday plans, then this may be one of the signs he is a player. If the relation­ship with you is serious, he will want to consider you as a part of his future. If you just mention what both of you will do, he will get no reason to worry in case he truly loves you. Listen to his opin­ion on you and the relationship. If he never talks about the future including you, then he may be a player.

14. He is often full of excuses.

One of the classic signs he is a player is a guy who is often full of excuses. He can act smoothly and convincingly so that you cannot notice that he is just lying to you. Sure, when everything happens, but you find that he makes a per­fect excuse for every reason why you get disappointed with him, then he may be a player. He seems sweet and apologetic whenever he gives you an excuse, perhaps, he is covering up the truth that he is lying to you.

15. He never calls you.

In current days, text messag­ing is often favored over phone calls. However, if a man does not care about you, he will not go out of his way to call you. And, if he cares about you, he will do that and dedi­cate his days to chatting with you one on one. Once your man does not call you and he rarely picks up the phone when you call him, then this might be one of the most alarming signs he is a player.

16. He wants to meet you alone all the time.

It is rather romantic when your guy wants to take some quality time for you. Nevertheless, if it oc­curs all the time, then you are in trouble.

In that case, you should ask him for a dinner out or a movie to watch his reaction. In case he insists he wants to spend time with you at his place or alone, then he might be playing the field.

17. He is self-obsessed.

Normally, a player will be ab­sorbed in himself. For example, he might check his phone too often during the conversation, he will be obsessed about his looks or he always mentions his own life.

That means he shows too little interest in your life, even when you tell your stories. He will not listen to it with a good interest like a man interested in you would do. In such case, he might not re­spect you, and when he gets what he wants, he will finally leave you.

18. He forces you for more drinks than usual.

He wants you to get drunk, and then lose your sensibilities for him to make use of it.

And, he even he does not care about if you drive back alone right after getting drunk and insists to purchase drinks after drinking for you. If you are seeing that guy, you should run away as he is not worth it.

19. He avoids making things clear.

Oftentimes, a player might not walk right up to you and say that he is a player so you need to stay away from me. He will be coyer about it so he could hold you on a string together with the rest of the other girls he is also playing with. Hence, once he does not make things clear about the relationship between him and you, then you could take it as a signal of a player. It means that he does not want an­ything serious yet still wants you to be around him. Also, it means that he does not respect you and does not value you. It does not matter whether he wants just a simple friendship or further, but he still needs to let you know what your relationship with him is. In case he does not, it is safe to conclude that he is playing the field with you.

20. He often flirts with other girls.

Of course, a little flirt is okay because it is natural for men. Nev­ertheless, if he intends to take flirt­ing to the next level in front of you, you can be sure that he is a player. That means, if he is a guy who is 100% interested in you, he will never do that.

21. He does not do PDA.

Does he want to hold your hands, kiss you or walk close to you when being in the public plac­es? If not, he is hiding something. You could assume that he is play­ing the field. He might not want other girls to know that he has had a lover already. That also means he has taken and could not have his other chicks anymore.

22. He touches you more than necessary.

Men know that women often do not like to get touched if there is not a special bond be­tween them. Hence, they had bet­ter respect for it.

If he usually touches your thigh or arm or holds your hand too frequently whilst talking to you and also pretends as if it is just normal, you should beware!
Maybe, he is a player.

23. He does not take pictures with you.

A player will not upload a spe­cial picture with a certain girl. If he refuses to show off pictures on social websites whilst you are constantly uploading those cutest pics, it shows that your guy has a different view of the relationship. The fact is, he needs to look available every time. If there is no picture between you and him on Twit­ter, Facebook, or Instagram, you should take a wild guess that he is a player. He might even be brushing off your relationship altogether!

24. There are a lot of female friends around him.

A guy with too many female friends will be most likely a player, and there is no easy way around that. In reality, sure people have friends of the opposite sex and there is nothing wrong with that fact. Yet, if the guy you are now dating has friends who are predominately female, and he might flirt and text with them too often, even right in front of you, then you could take it as a signal that he is a player.

25. He does not try to listen or understand you.

Players will be only out for one thing: to have fun! Normally, they do not want to get to know you. They do not want to listen to your voice, about your day. They do not want to spend their time trying to understand your feelings as well as your emotions. Hence, pay close attention to the ways he often reacts to you. Does your guy keep conversations simple, short, and fun? Or, does care to get to know you? The answers to these questions will tell you what he is right after in the long run.

26. He refers to himself as sin­gle.

If both of you have been “see­ing each other” for a certain amount of time, but he still refers to himself as being “single”, then he might be not looking forwards to something serious and playing the field. Of course, he does not want to jump into such a relationship shortly after both of you begin hanging out. Yet, if he does not mention that he is “seeing” someone special, then he might not want that relation­ship to escalate and wants to keep everything casual so he will not frighten off other women.

27. He gets texts from other women constantly.

If your guy always receives text messages from other girls while hanging out with you, then it is a clear sign he is a player. Guys are not often too big on texting. They are going to text their girlfriends and some friends here and there, yet they will not often have a doz­en of texts from a dozen girls. Es­pecially, if your man takes time to answer all of those texts from girls when hanging out with you. After all, he does not value your pres­ence so much.

28. He has not introduced you to his family and friends.

Upon a man likes a wom­an, he will want to introduce her to people around him, like friends and family. It is simply the way things work. However, if he is not even mentioning the idea of intro­ducing you to his family, or even his buddies, then he probably is not looking for serious things with you and would keep things cas­ual and calm whilst he has other women on his side.

Keep in mind that if the man you have been dating is exhibiting any of these signs he is playing, then you should not brush it under the rug or try to tell yourself it is nor­mal and even true. There are too many women doing that and try­ing to pursue a fragile, vogue rela­tionship with a player. Therefore, you should not lie to your own, move on!


Andrew is a professional writer with 7+ Years of experience. His style and uniqueness inspire and educate readers throughout the world.

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About the Author: Andrew

Andrew is a professional writer with 7+ Years of experience. His style and uniqueness inspire and educate readers throughout the world.

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